I was on the bus the other day and I saw a girl drop her iPhone. Honestly I could not stop laughing. She gave me a filthy look. I tried my hardest to fight back another wave of laughter.
Anyway this isn’t going to be another rant about why iHate apple so much, i’m sure we’re all very familiar with that by now. I just thought it was hilarious and definitely worth a mention. In fact i’m planning on this entire entry having no particular structure. Just a bunch of funny (chick dropping the iPhone), random (purple chickens) or completely awesome things (me fighting a bear) that happened during the week.
At the beginning of the week I checked the mail and found this:
Seriously, how epic is that name? BRTCVNIK. That’s one vowel!
Only two ways I can see it happening; either they are Russian or they slipped on the keyboard whilst typing out their name. Or both.
I wonder if people would take you seriously with a name like that on your passport or driver’s license. “You’ve got to be kidding me, get out!”
It’s kind of like the handful of people around the world actually named James Bond. Who the hell is going to believe that?! No one, that’s who, I’d tell them, “Get out of my bar you filthy swine.” (Now swine is a double header, on one hand it’s a crafty insult and on the other it is a slightly subtle yet devilishly awesome cultural reference to the 2009 swine flu hysteria. What now?!)
The holidays are a weird time for me. On one hand (yes i’m aware i just used that expression in the previous paragraph, fuck off) I love just relaxing and having nothing to do for a couple of weeks. But then after a while i start feeling guilty. Guilty that i’m not writing a novel or scaling Mt Everest. But seriously, every holidays i tell myself i will read more and write more. Never happens. Although on a high note i did finish two books at the start of the holidays and I submitted my first ever story to a publication (the one about the alien prostitute, class act that one). Oh and I had this rad idea about a dude who can smell the future. “I can smell something foul on the air, and it aint that dead chook out back, it smells like…the Apocalypse.”
I would really like to try and write a humorous story, because i always have funny ideas but they always tend to turn out serious. No idea why.
On a finishing note i’d like to praise and curse (but mostly praise) Wimbledon and The French Open. Curse for keeping me up until 4 am every night and preventing me from doing anything for their duration (people gotta know that in my life Slams take priority, I don’t care i have a 2000 word essay due the next day or if the god damn Pope is knockin on my door, Slams take priority).
And the praise part for obviously being awesome, high quality tournaments. Federer is without a doubt the greatest tennis player who ever lived and is most likely the 2nd greatest person who ever lived (do you have to ask about number 1?) and he is a magician. I can’t wait to see him play again at the Australian open.
P.s. Watch the Thriller video clip, it’s so outstandingly awesome.